tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post3332953465419378138..comments2024-03-28T12:29:39.157-07:00Comments on Graphic Firing Table: Cui Bono?FDChiefhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10607785969510234092noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-10866158425754930122008-06-18T10:07:00.000-07:002008-06-18T10:07:00.000-07:00Chief: I have always felt the same way about the T...Chief: I have always felt the same way about the Tolstoy phrase! Unhappiness arises from a fairly predictable set of objective or subjectives circumstances. (But of course, as a Russian author, unhappiness was his stock-in-trade.)<BR/><BR/>"happiness is, by its very nature, small, quiet, satisfied." Yes. And your description as anti-NASCAR is perfect. I cannot bear drama queens of either sex, and yet the highs and lows seems to pique most people's interest, I s'pose b/c their daily life is boring to them and drama makes them feel alive. I feel alive watching bugs or birds in the lawn.<BR/><BR/>I have a dear friend who has offered a ticket for me to attend "Sex and the City" with her; she can hardly wait. To me, what little I have seen of the show is rather tragic.Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08839236994990699117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-49788322942232766702008-06-16T21:22:00.000-07:002008-06-16T21:22:00.000-07:00"So is it because "most people" don't have enough ...<I>"So is it because "most people" don't have enough "everyday" sex, or enough "banging the wall" sex, to see the wisdom?"</I><BR/><BR/>Jimmy: My suspicion - and this is just my uninformed opinion - is that that most of us either don't feel like we know enough about Life, the Universe and Everything to make an informed judgement on what we see and hear, OR we pass judgement on everything, regardless of our level of understanding. This makes it difficult to really analyze and understand what we're seeing and hearing.<BR/><BR/>In particular, as Lisa points out, where love and sex are concerned. I think we tend to either accept the written and spoken word as Truth, or ignore it altogther. rather than really try and bring our reason and judgement to bear.<BR/><BR/>Good example: think of all the books and movies we read and see where the happy couple starts ot bickering and fighting and clearly without anything in common. How many couples like that do you now in real life? Yet we accept it, both as fictional cliche and, sadly, often in life, where the quiet girl longs for the wild guy or the shy guy wants the party girl. Or we assume that head-banging sex means we're soulmates. Or get angry with ourselves or with our partners because everything isn't "perfect"...<BR/><BR/>In short - I don't think it is the sex, spicy or vanilla. I think it's the way we THINK - or don't think - about the sex that gets us into such trouble.<BR/><BR/>Lisa: One of the things I've always hated about Tolstoy is his phrase: “Every happy family is the same, but unhappy families are all different.” My experience is the utter opposite: unhappy people and unhappy families are usually unhappy for a small set of the same reasons: money or lack or same; health problems; emotional problems and emotional dysfunction. Happiness, OTOH, is a truly complex and difficult thing to achieve.<BR/><BR/>BUT - happiness is, by its very nature, small, quiet, satisfied. A happy marriage, or a happy family, is usually interesting only to those involved. It's a stock car race with no crashes and little passing, where all the drivers involved work together to get to the same place quickly and quietly.<BR/><BR/>And how many of us would pay to watch that?<BR/><BR/>Sad, really...FDChiefhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10607785969510234092noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-88082262805697569182008-06-16T19:59:00.000-07:002008-06-16T19:59:00.000-07:00Chief,Yes, of course that crude dissection is best...Chief,<BR/><BR/>Yes, of course that crude dissection is best left for the Gothic romances. As the writer Beckett illustrated so well in his novel Murphy, one can give every single objective detail of individual, and know them no better than when you began.<BR/><BR/>"What's left w/o revenge and greed?" Now you've hit the crux of the matter. We're all voyeurs waiting for the crash, no better than the typical NASCAR enthusiast.<BR/><BR/>I would hope that artists show the manifold sides to relationships, but I don't know that "normal" or "happy" relationship is often depicted. Perhaps because that would be "boring"?<BR/><BR/>Pity, because I don't know too many people who have a truly happy, vibrant and full relationship. That would be the stuff of fairy tales.Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08839236994990699117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-81621506908412300162008-06-16T14:45:00.000-07:002008-06-16T14:45:00.000-07:00So is it because "most people" don't have enough "...So is it because "most people" don't have enough "everyday" sex, or enough "banging the wall" sex, to see the wisdom?Jimmyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02824445966708680114noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-88884371626393163652008-06-15T21:55:00.000-07:002008-06-15T21:55:00.000-07:00But - I should add - the problem with Art is that ...But - I should add - the problem with Art is that Art often shows us various sides of love and sex. After all, once you take revenge and greed out of it, what else do we write and sing about..?<BR/><BR/>And that's where the Artist can knock you sideways. As you point out, these stories where everyone has this incredible, clock-stopping sex - or, conversely, as in the case of this guy Sim I was discussing, the sex is a trap, or fake, or a ploy - don't really give you the full picture. But a LOT of people don't have the experience, or the perception, to seperate the dross from the wisdom.FDChiefhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10607785969510234092noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-38226851992285440642008-06-15T21:50:00.000-07:002008-06-15T21:50:00.000-07:00Lisa: point well taken.I always liked Donald West...Lisa: point well taken.<BR/><BR/>I always liked Donald Westlake's take on this: when one of the characters drives a car, the author doesn't feel obliged to explain how the left foot works the clutch as the right goes from brake to gas, how the hands move from wheel to gearshift. You know about the "wait-wait-that's it", the fadeaway caress, the feel of lips on skin, and if you don't, you shouldn't get your ideas from books - you'll get the wrong idea.FDChiefhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10607785969510234092noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-13042356512005873082008-06-15T17:08:00.000-07:002008-06-15T17:08:00.000-07:00Per your last query: To take it out of the realm o...Per your last query: <BR/><BR/>To take it out of the realm of this series, with which I am unfamiliar--yes, why is sex usually represented as a head-banging experience (if good), or rape (if bad or good, depending on the genre)? Wouldn't it be nice if people read that really good sex can be slow, compassionate and intimate?<BR/><BR/>I have always thought that books and movies (where most young people get their ideas) do such a great disservice to the cause of intimacy by suggesting that it must be so hot and heavy to be mind-blowing. Sadly, many people never grow to learn any better, and of course, that level of physicality depicted cannot be maintained. When that goes, ennui sets in.<BR/><BR/>The opposite should happen.Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08839236994990699117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-986067269758055052008-06-12T09:56:00.000-07:002008-06-12T09:56:00.000-07:00IMHO, great art, by definition, has to be meaningf...IMHO, great art, by definition, has to be meaningful to somebody besides the artist, otherwise it IS just graffiti.<BR/><BR/>I abandoned Laura Hamilton as a writer a LONG time ago. Believe it or not, she writes the Anita Blake series when she wants to write about something besides sex. The Merry Gentry series is all-sex all the time and apparently Merry can enjoy every form of sex including rape. Really boring.<BR/><BR/>If you're going to read the paranormal stuff, check out Patricia Brigg's latest work. MUCH better.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31246093.post-12930577328204542072008-06-12T08:45:00.000-07:002008-06-12T08:45:00.000-07:00I think your last (non-italicized)paragraph answer...I think your last (non-italicized)paragraph answers your question for you. I will say that my sister the artist has one huge pet peeve: when someone approaches her at a show and praises her art, but then asks if she can do the same thing in a different color, "so it will match my living room." Heh.Linda Dovehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02776352090489595324noreply@blogger.com