Poor little tad is blind as a nocturnal flying mammal. Her eyes were so bad that the opthalmologist couldn't get her prescription correct with the standard exam techniques. He had to send her home where we had to drop liquid atropine (nerve agent antagonist - WTF!??) in her eyes three nights running. It was throughly rotten...but now she has her new glasses, very pretty, don't you think?
One hopes that it takes her a while to see through it. Cynicism is not a pleasant attribute of youth.