Wednesday, February 25, 2026

The cheaper the crook...

 


...the gaudier the patter.

I didn't waste my time watching Felony Fats' Big Beautiful Lie-o-palooza last night. I don't, usually; these things are always polititheater, regardless of who delivers them. I might have listened to FDR, had I been around then, but I can't think of anyone else who's stood up at that rostrum worth spending an hour (or damn near two, in Tubby's case) hearing talk shit about how fucking great things are.

I read some excerpts from the transcript. The best description I've seen comes (as I'd suspected it would) from salty sailor Jim Wright: "If a psychotic off his meds gave a disassociated rambling speech to the inmates in the middle of the dayroom while being chased by the interns at the local home for the criminally insane it would look a lot like this."

Beyond that? I only got two reactions, the first being the quote from the Maltese Falcon that opens this post.

The second, though, was prompted by this line from Fatso's interminable Weave-of-the-Union: "I've always wanted the Congressional Medal of Honor, but I was informed I'm not allowed to give it myself... If they ever open up that law, I'll be there with you someday,"

This isn't the first time this draft-dodging fuck has talked up the idea that his ginormous ass deserves the nation's highest decoration for bravery. Supposedly some time earlier he'd said:

“I decided to go to Iraq. I was extremely brave. So brave in fact that I wanted to give myself the Congressional Medal of Honor, I said to my people, ‘Am I allowed to give myself the Congressional Medal of Honor?’”

There have been some Chief Executives who could have had a legitimate call on a high award for valor. This boastful bastard? Don't make me laugh.

The mere thought of this bloated nitwit in the same grid square as the MOH makes the Army sergeant that lives in my head reach for a sturdy piece of dimension lumber, wishing for ten minutes in a locked supply room alone with his criminal ass to provide him with some wall-to-wall counseling on how he isn't just not just unfit to wear the medal but utterly unfit to empty a urinal overfilled by the lowliest private in military history.

4 comments:

Brian Train said...

People commented on how he was making an obvious production of reading the parts of prepared text off the teleprompter... leaning forward, squinting, demonstratively switching from one prompter to the other, and reading in a halting monotone like an elementary school kid unfamiliar with the words. Of course he is at his happiest ranting into the mike from half an inch away, which he did do for much of the 108 minutes it lasted.

FDChief said...

I can't find it now, but this morning I read one of my usual suspects who commented that to them it seemed pretty obvious that the "plan" was to use the first 30-50 minutes as a sedative. Tubby would read his script in his usual way ("halting monotone" = "boring") so that the normies would get bored and turn off the tube. THEN he got his MAGA Rant Mode on and fed the red meat to the Base.

I'm not sure if he still has the demagogic skills anymore, but it does sound like the aort of thing he'd do if he does.

Brian Train said...

Probably a trick he picked up from Der Fuhrer (or else Stephen Miller told it to him): he would start out hesitant, quiet, nearly a monotone... and then build up to the screaming and ranting, pulling everyone with him. A form of hypnosis.

FDChief said...

Good summary of the Three Faces of Tubby here: https://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2026/02/three-versions-of-donald-2

"...as Trump ages, bullshit in this technical sense seems to be giving way gradually to a combination of pure stupidity and creeping dementia. Trump’s insane ranting about the California wildfires wasn’t, I suspect, some self-conscious bit of demagogic manipulation: Trump believed what he was saying because what has become the overwhelmingly central fact about the man, more than all the and corruption and sheer evil, is that he is now, comprehensively, a demented idiot. What, we might well wonder, happens when he really does order the Air Force to nuke a hurricane?

Trump’s original Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson, painted a grim enough picture what Trump was like eight years ago now (Trump fired Tillerson in the spring of 2018). Even back then, Tillerson said, Trump could not hold a sustained conversation, or focus on more than two or three points during a meeting.

“If I could put a photo or a picture in front of him, or a map or a piece of paper that had two big bullet points on it, he would focus on that, and I could build on that,” Tillerson said in 2021. “Just sitting and trying to have a conversation as you and I are having just doesn’t work.”

And things seem to have gotten a good deal worse since then."