Scene: The White House Situation Room, deep below the Oval Office.
The Commander Guy is moving little army men around his Situation Room mapboard of Baghdad muttering to his coterie of uniformed flunkies, moving squads here and there when LTG Lute comes in with a sheaf of dispatches:
W: Well, man? Where is al-Dafi? Where is al-Awadi?
Lute: My Decider, I...the latest reports...Petraeus says that they have removed al-Dafi, and Al-Awadi has resigned. The Iraqis aren't coming.
W: Liar! Traitor! Al-Dafi IS coming! Al-Dafi will defeat the terrorists! Al-..."
(scene dissolves in chaos as Dubya falls twitching and begins gnawing the carpet as aides squeak and begin to panic for the exits)