If I was a pirate (and why not?) and I was reaving the littoral waters off Somalia (and who wouldn't?), I'd hate like hell to have to face the wrath of the Republic of Korea Ship...MUNMU THE GREAT!!
Is that a terrific ship name or what?
I understand the great traditions of the U.S. Navy and why our ships are named after things like battles and states and venal, racist senators and nasty, dimwitted, senile actors. But when I contemplate the fear that the foe facing the mighty Munmu must feel...
...I have a certain sympathy for the Honorable John S. Williams (D-Mississippi):"
Whereas the British Sea Monster which we are imitating has been named Dreadnought- an archaic name- this man-o-war is hereby named Skeered O'Nuthin as an expression of our true American spirit; Provided further, that it is hereby made the duty of the first Captain who shall command her to challenge in the nation's name, the so called Dreadnought to a duel a outrance, to take place... in sight of Long Island and that on the occasion of the combat the President and his cabinet... being fond of the strenuous life, shall be entertained on the quarter-deck as guests of the ship and the nation."So, while I'm just woolgathering...couple of other things.
What is it with people going "outdoors" looking like they were going to the goddam mall? The nice people from the parks service that staff Sabino Canyon make sure you understand that the canyon is a desert. It's HOT. It's DRY. It's SUNNY. They even give you a picture to show you the best way to stay safe and comfortable walking the main access road. Hat, loose clothing that covers you, some trail food, sturdy shoes, sunscreen, water.
So what did we see getting on and off the tram that runs the length of the canyon?
Wifebeaters. Flip-flops. Titty tops. Assgrabbing shorts and babies in little umbrella strollers. Cans of soda pop (if that) and a handful of Cheetos.
Wassup wit dat? Are these people just not bright? Do they not care, or do they think that the real outdoors is like a Disney park where you can duck into Donald's Drink N' Doze if the beer nuts run out or the baby gets sunburned or the little woman blows out a flippy? I mean, it's not THIS bad
C'mon. Are we really that stupid?
And speaking of wierd stuff in public...did you know that public frottage is a real problem in Japan?
Yep. You know what frottage is, right? "Frotteurism"? Oh. Well, okay, that thing where you rub yourself up against someone to provide you or them (or both of you) with sexual pleasure?
Frottage. Frotteurism. Whatev.
BUT. Apparently one of the hazards of the crowded Tokyo (and other big Japanese cities) public transit systems is that anonymous people will...ummm...rub you the wrong way.It's called "chikan" in Japanese, 痴漢, チカン, or ちかん, and is also a common theme of Japanese porn (which, for reasons best know to the Japanese, also involves a lot of "Shibari" - rope-tied women. For some sort of cultural reasons Japanese men consider sex just "enh" but tying your woman up with elaborate rope trusses? Yowza!! Go figure). And the problem is so bad that the Tokyo transit people actually offer women-only cars to keep people's (OK, men's) grubby little hands to themselves.
Damn, people are wierd.
And in the category of "wierd people"?
Here's some idiot called Sanford, and no, it's not the Fred character from the old sitcom, the GOP gov of South "We LIKE our roads shitty" Carolina, saying - actually SAYING - "What you're doing is buying into the notion that if we just print some more money that we don't have and send it to different states, we'll create jobs. If that's the case, why isn't Zimbabwe a rich place?"
Wait, sunshine, wait...are you saying that spending fake money, money not backed up by tax revenues, is BAD? Like, Zimbabwean bad? Like the sort of thing that only poor, stupid nigras do?
But...but...how does that square with the fact that your fellow GOP jackholes just managed to spend EIGHT YEARS driving our entire COUNTRY from a multibillion-dollar surplus into a multibillion-dollar deficit (you know, where the outlay exceeds the income? Yeah, turdblossom, THAT deficit) to fight a bunch of land wars in asia and enrich the two-yacht family? To ensure the decline of your country, never mind your crappy little impoverished state, into an oligarchy with more convicts than millionaires?
Can you explain that to us, dummy? Or can you at least draw us a picture of how defict spending to fight moronic wars of choice = good while deficit spending to try and keep people from starving and losing their homes = bad? And why Republicans BELIEVE this mindless drivel, not only since their history in the Depression proved them flat-ass wrong but......now with fifty percent more frottage!?!
Oh, sorry, Dubya. I thought you some weird Japanese guy on a train or something. I see you had important...ummm...business of state to address.
Anyway...you say those are GOOD reasons to just "print some more money". That then it's OK. just so long as you weren't jerking around like some dumb ol' Aferkin nigras trying to, y'know, help stave off A FUCKING DEPRESSION!!!
So I needed some good thoughts, and whenever I need that I just head over to "Waiting For Sprout" to check up on brand new mom Kelli and her little Madeline.
Cute? OMFG, we're talking a Cuteness Tsunami! A veritable Black Plague of Cuteness! The Great Awakening of Cutitude! These two are Cute Squared to the Nth Power of Cute!
Joe Bob says: check 'em out!
OK. Done meandering. Back tomorrow with more real thinking. Have a good day and watch your ass in crowded subways. Banzai!