Thursday, July 08, 2010

...high cotton...

Summer has finally decided to turn up.

The last several days have been hot, mid to upper 90's, which...is where my daughter jumped in my lap and caused me to post this prematurely. Sorry. Here's the rest of what I meant to post;

Anyway, it's damn hot. And to add to the entertainment, my usual commute home blew up Wednesday, trapping me and about 7-800 other commuters on northbound McLoughlin Blvd. as an old (as in 60-year-old) 12-inch water main deconstructed, flushing out the subgrade from under 1/8-mile of street.After a half-hour wait in the 90-degree heat I managed to turn around, find a local place to eat (and several hefeweitzens...), and after an hour...it was STILL a parking lot. Wednesday evening I left the office door at 5:05 and stepped through my own at 7:15. Yikes.

The kiddos have been sweethearts - having their Auntie Kathie here to give them a daycare break has helped. But we're going to need to pool time if this heat keeps up. Air conditioning and nonstop kidvid is NOT a good substitute for getting outdoors.

Oh. I should probably mention that it turns out that I have developed an intestinal ailment.

There are people whose nature it is to suffer from interesting and picturesque ailments. "Consumption". Now there was a disease. You wasted away delicately, fastidiously, Greta Garbo dying scenically in "Camille".

Or leukemia. You could get somewhere with leukemia - hell, Campbell Scott dawdling grave-ward with leukemia managed to nail Julia Roberts in that perennial topic of Oscar-neglect, "Dying Young". Those are diseases a guy can make work.

But this one? Nope. This one will forever be associated with SNL's Joe Piscopo and Robin Duke moaning that they have diiiiverticuliiiitisssss...
Yes. I have diverticulitis.

The is just no fucking romance in that.

Aside from the lack of theatrically pale wasting away, I've been taking antibiotics for two weeks, which, if your internal workings weren't screwed up before is guarenteed to screw them up fairly thoroughly. And I have been living with the sensation of having a roughly hamster-sized object wedged in my lower gut, which is about as much fun as it sounds.

So living isn't exactly easy.

But I suspect that the fish are jumping in the Willamette, somewhere. But don't eat them; they're full of PCBs, lead, creosote, and fecal coliforms.

Welcome, summer.

Yes, it's very nice to see you, too.

We'd be good with a teensy little less...ummm...summeryness, though.

OK?

4 comments:

Barry said...

'Which'


At which point the normal 364 days-per-year of rainy weather resumed, shattering FDChief into 1,000 pieces, due to the humidity shock.

FDChief said...

Naah. 4-year-old daughter.

Fixed it, tho. Tralala.

Ael said...

It's funny, I'm about as content as a man can be. However, I'm always wanting something different.

Lucky for me, my druthers often revolve around the weather

Lisa said...

Our infrastructure is showing more and more cracks these days. Sorry about the hot traffic snafu.

Thank you for sharing that SNL classic, which I'd never seen (though I'm afraid I know that couple.)

As for being romantically tetched, you could always take up the absinthe habit...

I'd recommend recovery, though, and I hope you're feeling much better soon, and in tall cotton yourself.